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8. It's All In Your Head.

WARNING- This is more of a personal statement than good advice. It’s just me typing out the nebulous thoughts in my head that I need to clear out. Read if you want.

It’s a fact- I worry too much. I worry about what people think of me, I worry about handling my college classes, I worry about my family, I worry about my social life, I worry about my health, and I worry about my future.  

Sometimes, I get too caught up in worrying about all these things, especially the first and last- what people think of me and my future. Worrying too much about what people will say for some of your actions mentally restricts you from trying new things. How are we supposed to know what’s actually good for us just based on other people’s judgments?

Recently, I went through formal recruitment and joined a sorority. As of two weeks ago, becoming a sorority girl never crossed my mind. Going through recruitment was just something I did to meet new people and try new things, and somehow I ended up going through all of recruitment. I don’t regret going through recruitment, because I made some awesome new friends. But actually joining a sorority- thinking about it has been causing more stress than it should just because I’m overthinking it. I’m worrying about what being a “sorority girl” entails, and I’m worried about how people will view me. After going through recruitment and meeting the girls in my chapter, it’s clear that the sisters are filled with ambition and positivity and are super involved on campus. Going to a tech school, everyone is academically driven, and the sororities understand that academics come first. Despite being told this fact, I still worry about whether joining Greek life is the right commitment for me.

I can’t pinpoint exactly what worries the most. Is it the fear of becoming someone I don’t want to be? Is it the fear of not getting time for other activities? Is the stereotype that I used to associate with Greek Life? Why can’t I just stop caring and just go forth?

The hardest part about all this is that it’s all probably in my head. Everyone’s too busy caring about themselves, no one probably examines us with that much detail of judgment. Worrying about these nonexistent judgements others could inhibit us from trying something new that could possibly change your life for the better. As I debate whether I want to drop this new commitment, I can’t help but think of the potential on both sides. Staying in the organization, I could make new friends that will last a lifetime. I could get connections to amazing career opportunities. I could gain leadership experience. Dropping the organization, I might find other groups I feel more passionate for. I may discover friends I bond with more tightly. In reality, why can’t I just live the best of both worlds?! Stay in the organizations and join new ones and make an even larger group of friends and connections.

My mind always thinks through this process and then I end up overcommitting myself. If I move past the worries in my head and starting living life in the moment, life would be much easier.

The day I learn to stop worrying about nonexistent opinions and potential consequences will be one for the books.

Comments

  1. RockSiddyMay 12, 2021 at 7:00 AM

    I'm excited to see when that day comes. In the Defining Decade, the author speaks about overcoming this worry as an adult and that many people start to get past this in their 30s. Lebron James made a very similar statement regarding when he stopped worrying so much; however, you don't need to wait till 30 to get past this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nikita DeshpandeJune 23, 2021 at 1:53 PM

      Wow. Thank you for introducing me to that book :) Super powerful message!

      Delete

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