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6. Always Question Yourself

"Don't let anyone change your dreams."
Well, unless your dreams are uh... outdated.

There's something magical and inspiring about individuals who follow through with every word they say. It takes a lot of willpower to stay driven and focused on something for an extended period of time. This is a skill we all rightfully strive for in certain aspects of life. However, some aspects of life deserve a little more flexibility.
I was always ashamed to admit that I changed my life goals and ambitions quite frequently. I was dead set on becoming a research doctor for a majority of high school, but I suddenly reoriented myself for a future void of any lab science at all. Evidently, that’s okay- no one expects you to know what you want to do at such a young age. However, people do often tell us to “never let go of your dreams”.

What no one really mentions is that it’s okay for your dreams to change.
It’s always inspiring and warming when someone fulfills their childhood dream of becoming a *insert cute/heroic occupation*, but not everyone is born with a certainty of what they aspire to do. Blindly chasing the dream you set when you had no real world experiences could limit you and hinder you from discovering higher potential in other fields. When we are younger, we may think we have high logic behind the goals we set, but in reality, determining the “right path” comes with the experiences later in life.

For example, I loved AP Biology and AP Chemistry, and science fairs were my favorite type of fair. Hence, as the mature fifteen year old I was, I deemed myself “passionate” about scientific research. “Passion” was a buzz word I tried to stick onto one of the limited activities I pursued through my suburban education. The summer before senior year, I finally got the real world experience of interning at a research facility at a local university. And it was quite painful. The boring kind of painful. The “I’m clueless and don’t have enough energy or interest to stop being clueless” kind of painful. I still love chemistry and science fairs, but it’s nothing like what research really is.
Getting a real taste of my dream job hit me with a reality check- perhaps research wasn’t my fit. Perhaps those good Chemistry scores, science fair medals, and the silent desire to be a female in STEM didn’t mean much taken out of classroom context.

As I began to apply to colleges that fall, I forced myself to reflect. As I listed my extracurriculars and I penned out my essays, it became clear to me that my interests were constantly being shaped and adapted. I was not the same person I was when I came up with the whole “I want to be a research doctor” dream. Now, I was a girl interested in leadership, logistics, and communication. Apart from studying Anatomy & Physiology one summer and interning in a chemistry lab the next, nothing about my experiences or commitments revealed an inclination for science research.

I share this story because my dream was outdated. I began to question all the aspirations I had held on to. Why did I want to become a research doctor? Was patience and observation in my blood, or did being a PhD fit the scholastic and noble vibe I always wanted? Why did I want to go to Harvard? Was I genuinely looking forward to its multitude of resources, or was I just chasing the elite Ivy League title?

There’s nothing wrong with having outdated dreams; they define phases in our lives that we will grow up to cherish. However, questioning ourselves is vital to making sure that our dreams are still our dreams we want to chase and not deadweights we are trying to carry across a finish line.

Comments

  1. RockSiddyMay 12, 2021 at 6:56 AM

    Do you ever think people don't chase their dreams because they're afraid of finding out that it's not as fulfilling as they imagined and worry about having to start from scratch if it's not?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nikita DeshpandeJune 23, 2021 at 1:55 PM

    Wow, I've actually never considered that but I think you're right! That's probably something subconsciously hindering them.

    ReplyDelete

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